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SPECIES OF SHARKS

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Currently sharks are categorized as follows.

1 Cow and frilled sharks
2 Dogfish sharks
3 Sawsharks
4 Angel sharks
5 Bullhead sharks
6 Mackerel sharks
7 Carpet sharks
8 Ground sharks

New species of sharks are being found as we reach deeper and deeper into the oceans.

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SCIENTIST CLAIMS TO BE EXPERT ON A NEW SPECIES OF SHARK

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What terrors lie within this house?

A young scientist set the shark world and twitter ablaze today when he announced a new species he calls a “House Shark”.  Zachary Taylor, a privately funded Biologist, claims he is the first and only expert on this breed of fish, er mammal, er fish?  “I’ve been studying sharks my whole life, and my discovery of this species was quite by accident.  That makes me the one and only authority on them,” Zachary explained to a mostly incredulous crowd in a recent seminar in Las Vegas, NV.  “But I am currently in the process of assembling my data and scientific proof to reveal to the public at large.”

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Zachary Taylor on a recent “House Shark” Expedition

“There is no such thing as a House Shark” declared Shark Biologists when contacted about Dr. Taylor’s claims.  “I’ve never heard of anything so ridiculous.  If there was a shark on land I think we would have come across it by now.  The shark has been around for millions of years and there’s no call for it to suddenly make such an evolutionary jump”.

Still, for now, Zachary Taylor remains the one and only House Shark expert.  He has founded the House Shark Institute in order to further the study and proof of this animal’s existence.  Unitl that time, the rest of will continue to feel safe and secure and unafraid of shark attacks within our homes.

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MASSACRE AT THE SYRACUSE PARADE OF HOUSES

Authorities are baffled today by a series of attacks that resulted in several deaths and injuries at today’s annual Parade of Houses in Syracuse, NY.

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One Real Estate Agent, who refused to give his name, claims a “Shark” emerged from the plumbing in the home and attack the people inside.  Of course, authorities determined this individual to be suffering from stress and shock due to the incidents and his claims have not been taken serious at this time.

Regardless, something did attack several real estate agents and families as they participated in one of the area’s biggest events, an event that brings with it a significant flow of money to the area.  Reagan Real Estate, the top Sales Company in the area, claims that faulty plumbing and gas lines in the area likely lead to the chaos, causing a ripple effect over several homes.

A for sale sign stands outside of a home in Princeton, Illinois, U.S., on Wednesday, May 30, 2012. The number of Americans signing contracts to buy previously-owned homes fell in April by the most in a year, indicating the U.S. housing recovery remains uneven. Photographer: Daniel Acker/Bloomberg via Getty Images

A for sale sign stands outside of a home in Princeton, Illinois, U.S., on Wednesday, May 30, 2012. The number of Americans signing contracts to buy previously-owned homes fell in April by the most in a year, indicating the U.S. housing recovery remains uneven. Photographer: Daniel Acker/Bloomberg via Getty Images

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WHAT ATTRACTS SHARKS?

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There has been much researched done in order to determine what attracts sharks and causes them to attack.  Much research has been inconclusive, but there are some general theories.  Irregular sounds, like a fish in distress, seems to attract sharks from great distances.  Sound seems to be the primary cue, not sight or smell.  Blood has also been shown to attract some sharks.  Some sharks can distinguish light colors from dark and some may even be able to tell the difference between some colors.

Blood itself may not be a solo factor in atracting sharks.  Some research found blood in combination with other factors will excite a shark and lead them to attack.  The most dangerous species in order of documented attack records are: the great white shark, bull shark, tiger shark, grey nurse shark, lemon shark, blue shark, sand tiger, several species of hammerheads, and the mako.

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